In a recent study, John Bargh and his colleagues at New York University asked their volunteers to do a mental task involving words relating to old age, such as "wrinkled", "grey" and "bingo". A second group were shown words unrelated to old age. The researchers then said the experiment was over and secretly recorded the time each participant took to walk down the long hallway to the exit. Those with old age on their mind took significantly longer to walk down the corridor.

So it seems that a just a few moments' thinking time can prime you to perform either better or worse than normal at both mental and physical tasks. Source: http://www.newscientist.com/channel/being-human/mg19426031.700-a-quirky-look

A common theme that I find coming up time and time again with my clients is their frequent use of disempowering or negative language. The study above supports the theory that the types of words that we use and focus on will determine our behaviour. Do you ever find yourself saying to yourself “I am not a fool” or “I don’t feel so bad” or “I can’t fail”? What do all these phrases have in common? They all contain a double negative – two negative words in the same sentence in an attempt to say something positive.

In the first example the two negative words are “Not” and “Fool”. Unfortunately, because of how our brains work, by using this type of language we are actually keeping ourselves focused on the negative in this case being a fool. The net result is; the phrase does us more harm than good. As long as we keep using negative and disempowering words in our language either when talking to others or talking to ourselves, we will stay stuck.

The solution: Start using more positive and empowering language. “I am not a fool” might be replaced with “I am a smart, intelligent person”. “”I don’t feel so bad” could be replaced with “I feel great”. “I can’t fail” can be replaced with “I can succeed”.

Notice how your body language, how you stand, your posture, your facial expression changes when you start using more empowering language. Notice how other people see you and greet you when you take more responsibility for the language that you use.

I am not suggesting that we should ignore any challenges (notice I use the word challenges not problems) and just think happy thoughts all the time. What I am suggesting is that we become more aware of our everyday language that is both going on in our own heads and when talking with other people and make a conscious effort to put a more positive emphasis on our communication.

I would also suggest that you consider how much exposure you want to the news each day as there is a tremendous amount of negativity there.

Fergal O’Connor is a Business and Personal Life Coach working in partnership with his Business and Private clients providing a supportive, confidential, challenging and non-judgemental environment to make their ambitions and dreams a reality. Fergal also facilitates a range of Coaching and Management training programs, Team facilitation workshops and is available for public speaking engagements. Fergal can be contacted at Synergy Coaching Services, Tel: (061) 467287, email This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it web www.synergycoaching.ie

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